Things are looking up... kind of

     Um let me start off by saying... WHERE THE HECK DID NOVEMBER GO? I swear it was only last week that I was starting to get ready for my trip back home to New York. Now it's been 10 days since I left England! Lots has been going on between coming back and the last time I wrote about Oktoberfest and ice skating at the Museum of Natural History in Kensington. Still in shock it has been that long since I have posted.

    So here is an update on things before I get back to my happy go lucky posts of exciting places I have been going to. Sam and I left London with the hopes that once I landed our solicitor would submit my paperwork for my visa. Since the course of true love never did run smooth, we hit a few bumps along the way. A lot of it had to do a lot with miscommunication and lack of time to formulate an actual plan. Currently the solicitor has completed paperwork and by Monday we will have a full idea of what the next steps are. Nothing quite makes you scattered for brains than not knowing where your life will be in the next week let alone next month. 

   I was set to fly back with Sam to England on the 27th of November but because the paperwork had still not been completed, let alone handed in because of insufficient documents, I had to change my ticket. This meant a few things were about to happen. I had to change my return ticket date to a time that I still don't know will be enough, and I would have to do the number one thing I thought I would never have to do again since marrying Sam... we'd have to be apart for what is still an unknown amount of time. And let me tell you, if I could talk to the Nicole and Sam that were merely just saying goodbye to each other at terminal 4 of JFK airport as boyfriend and girlfriend, well I would have laughed at them. Because nothing hurts nearly as much as saying goodbye to your husband that you had seen everyday for the last 507 days (yeah I actually checked). It also meant that I would be missing the Mumford and Sons concert at the O2 on November 29th that I was lucky enough to get seats for, and because I didn't buy insurance (thinking what could go wrong?) I have to just eat the money for them. Which is a whole other annoyance I wont begin to go off on. But obviously this was the least of my worries but just a small add on. 

     What should be happening in the next few weeks or so should be simple. Sam meets with the solicitor on Monday, he then has the entire batch of documents and application nicely and neatly sent over to me so that whenever it is that I have to go to the embassy to get "checked out" I have everything I need in order to make their jobs easier to say yes. Then I will have my visa and finally be able to go back to my new home and start an actual life with Sam. I say actual life because I haven't been able to work and teach, the job that I have dreamed of doing since the age of 5. Not only that, to me a life is having structure and a regimen. It may sound weird but I long to have an alarm set for something I actually need to get up for. You might be laughing but to me in order to not turn into a couch potato (which has happened at times) I need to have a set schedule. I'm not that friend who's like I might be doing this or I might go there. I'm a solid yes or no lady. So Sam and I are back to our long distance relationship routines of Facetime regularly, ridiculous amounts of phone calls, watching tv shows at the same time so we can talk about them, and of course binge eating (my stretchy pants are doing overtime work after Thanksgiving). 

     You might be asking yourself, ok Nicole I'm reading these good things and all seems to be in motion here, what's the problem? Well my life wouldn't be as exciting as it is if there wasn't some twist in all of this. Since I changed my return flight to the 17th of December, it now puts a heavier time restraint on when things can get done. That's also because the man helping me schedule my return flight let me know that there are no other seats or days available to return until January. Sure I could maybe try a different airline or maybe even airport if I really needed to, but at this point with no incoming money from funemployment, it's just not realistic. Sorry not sorry if I sound like a bit of a drag here but this situation has not been easy. I am not playing down the fact that I am extremely fortunate to have parents who love me incredible amounts that I get to spend a lot of quality time with now. Or that I have another family across the pond who loves me too. It is just a hard pill to swallow when something you thought you were so sure of getting gets ripped out of your hands in an instant and you're forced to change a lot of your future plans. And the not knowing is what kills me the most. 

     The entire reasoning of me even sharing all of this is because I hope that if this unfortunate situation becomes of a friend of a friend or even someone who just happens to stumble across my page, I want to help them and inform them of everything that I know and have had happened to me and Sam. I have already had a few people contact me that I had not known previously before starting this blog. I've been asked about long distance relationship advice, and on the process of immigration. While I don't make myself out to know everything about either subject, I would help someone the best I can to feel even slightly better about what they are going through. I know we're not the first and most certainly not the last. 

     To end this on a positive note I'll let you know some of the good things that have happened so far since the last post.

1. I have created an incredible bond with a 7 year old girl, who I know will be in my life fora very long time. 

2. I have been able to spend Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday) with my parents and Sam.

3. I got to see my 4 best friends in the entire world and all their fellas.

4. Sam and I got to visit Astoria  and Legends bar in NYC (where we first met) a few times while he was here and reminisce on some amazing memories while living there. 

5. I legally changed my name to my married name!

6. I have plans to see a lot more of my friends and family for the next upcoming weeks while I'm in New York.

7. I have booked a trip to LA for next Friday to see my beautiful best friend Jordana.

8. And finally yesterday the 29th of November I was FINALLY granted my professional license for teaching! This also means that I will have the qualifications to teach anywhere I'd like to when I return to the UK. 

There will be more posts to come VERY soon, with all these good things happening. I'm doing my best to stay positive in the meantime and hopefully can update with good news soon.

      

 

A bump in the road...

   
     Last week was a crazy busy week so apologises for not being so regular with my postings. But I've got a few posts coming within the next few days because I've done a bunch of exciting things I'd like to share. To catch you up a bit on whats going on. Since being here I have applied for a spouse visa so that I can start actually settling into my new home. If getting all the paperwork sorted and providing enough information wasn't hard enough, Sam and I unfortunately received a rejection notice from the U.K government for my visa. So what does that mean now? Well it means that hefty application fee we had to pay goes right into the pocket of the government and we basically have to start the application process all over again. That's the nice version of it.

     After being extremely down and frustrated we looked into getting a solicitor because clearly we had missed something. The hard thing is that we actually did nothing wrong on paper. We filled out the forms correctly and provided a lot of information. We even sent them our bank statements with highlights of where I was getting paid regularly from the Department of Education. The solicitor told us that basically the people who work for granting visas only accept a bare minimum of ways information is presented to them. Basically we needed to provide original pay slips as opposed to bank statements. Which is ridiculous because they show the exact same thing! The most annoying part was that because of the lack of information on the government websites and the information and vague information we received on the few phone calls that we had with employees to make sure that we had everything we needed, it still wasn't presented to us fully. The major reason of the rejection of my visa was that I wasn't actually allowed to apply for the visa while being in the UK. Which also does not make any sense to me.

     So now what will happen is I will have to return to New York for potentially 6-8 weeks submit my application while there and stay until it is granted. The unfortunate part of that is since I won't be leaving until November 20th (we booked flights for thanksgiving thinking I would have my visa by now) it leaves the possibility of not being with Sam for the holidays and being apart for a long period of time. The situation is very bittersweet because on the one hand I'll be home with my family and friends and be back in my home state of New York, but on the other hand I'll be worried about my visa being granted and know that my life in the U.K isn't progressing how I had planned. I really thought by now I would be starting my career in the UK as a teacher (that the country is in desperate need of). It's just a very confusing and frustrating process, especially when you're in a obvious legitimate relationship and just want to start your life together. We expected it all to go smoothly with the visa since Sam and I did all the paperwork for his visa in New York on our own and it was granted (although the process takes MUCH longer).

     We're choosing to stay on the positive side of things and just looking at this as another bump in the road to us getting the life we've planned for one another. I'm looking at it as a massive vacation in New York to do the things that I have always wanted to do without having the amount of free time that I will have now. I'd like to plan some trips to my friend on the West Coast, blog about my favourite places in Astoria Queens and spend some much needed time with my family and finally get to meet my little nugget niece for the first time.

     I really hope that in writing this post I have given people a little insight to what it's like to have a international relationship and even though Sam and I put on a good face and look like we're always happy, we do have our struggles. Although it may not be with each other it is with the life that we share. I also hope that maybe someone who is reading this will be in a similar situation and get some information on how to go about getting their visa the right way without having to sell a kidney on the black market to pay for all of the ridiculous fees. Although it will be hard for me and Sam to be apart for so long at least we know that when I return to London we will have everything sorted and FINALLY be able to begin an actual life in our new home.